This doesn't fit

I believe that fitting in is a choice, not a situation.

If you really choose to fit in with that group, you probably will.

Maybe it won't seem to others that you fit in but the most important thing is what you feel.

How can you say you don't fit in, when you don't even try?

You only show up for events that interest you, where there are like mat salleh speakers and you don't interact with any of us much. 

No one has an easy time fitting in at first, no one can perfectly just zuup into a group the first time they meet.

Those who are able to do so are always the ones who are outspoken and making the first move. Talking first, saying 'hi' first etc. 

Sadly not every one of us were born to be like that. So then? What can you do?

You're supposed to MAKE bonds / friendships slowly. Gradually small buds will bloom into beautiful flowers, and that's when you'll witness the wonderful thing called friendship. If the bond is strong, nothing will part you, you'll feel comfortable interacting with them and not create excuses.

These are people you can openly tell 'I don't feel like doing this' heck, before  you even tell them, they would already know. And these are the friendships I live for. 

How do you think we got so close-knit in the first place? We went through all sorts of turmoils and mountains and valleys, many left, many joined, but who are you to judge from outside that we're perhaps not 'interesting' enough for you? 

I'm sick of people who claim no one accepts them for who they are, claim that they don't fit in anywhere, but do nothing to fix that. 

I'm sick of hearing people complain of being left out of things when (depending on the situation) it wasn't even in their place to be part of something or to know something. 

You've got to know your place in that friendship before questioning something.

Like who am I to question why the alumni don't invite me to their gatherings? Because i'm not part of their 'gang', so i know my place and just brush it off like whatever. 

I used to feel super offended whenever I saw some 'WO gathering' thing on ig or fb but you know what I realised, I'm not the only one feeling that, and now I've learnt not to give a damn. 

And I learnt to fit in without really fitting in. 

So, 

Before you people open your mouths to whine about what people are not doing to help YOU fit in, think about what you're actually doing on YOUR side to help YOURSELF fit in.